Monday, April 25, 2011

Everything is better with rope

My love of rope is well documented and undisputed.

And really, what's not to love?

In my blog Peeing on nodder I detailed my first golden shower experience with him. It was very very hot and I'll never forget how he looked laying there in my tub with his wrists bound above his head.

We did it again, a week or so later, only I didn't tie his wrists, didn't use rope of any kind. It was hot - almost as hot as the first time. But nodder and I both agreed that him being bound definitely increased the hotness factor.

Tying up cock and balls is always fun but tonight I took it in a new and exciting direction with nodder. Using about two yards of black paracord, I wrapped his balls snugly, then twisted the cord and separated his balls. I then preceded to wrap his cock in the paracord, crisscrossing it tightly up the length.

I played with his cock, squeezing the rope into the sensitive skin, stroking his cock gently then roughly over the rope, slapping his cock, blowing cold air slowly down its length, even teasing the head of his cock with my tongue.
I put a condom over it and then fucked it, rope and all.

Most of my typical CBT moves were enhanced by the paracord. And It was easier to get that delicious wince of his out of him. And the grimace. And maybe even a growl.

Even for me the sensations were new. The velvety warmth of his hardness was broken up by the rough paracord and through the light teasing touches, hard squeezing and sharp smacking, my hand relished each and every new sensation.

More than once I unwrapped his cock, played with the smooth length, and then retied it before teasing and abusing him some more.

And then when I got it wrapped just the way I wanted it, I put a condom over his cock, and the paracord I'd wrapped and tied around it, and fucked him.


As I slid down his cock, the first thing I noticed was how his cock was no longer smooth. The paracord wrapped around his cock meant he was now ribbed for my pleasure in a major way. The paracord around the base of his cock that wasn't covered by the condom created some new friction sensations for my labia.

But probably most important of all - the rope added some girth to his cock.

And what girl doesn't like a little girth?

OK, a LOT of girth.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Top space: my new favorite drug

I was discussing with 6 the hotness of a scene he'd participated in. It wasn't co-topping but more like sharing.

I enjoy sharing and I'm discovering I enjoy watching. Not random voyeurism though. I've pinpointed the hotness being wrapped up in the fact that I have some kind of connection with one or more of the people I'm watching. It's my new favorite thing.

Anyway, I was telling 6 about how much I enjoyed watching him, how much I enjoyed when our eyes met and I could see how much he was enjoying who I was sharing with him. I cited specific moments that were incredibly hot for me. My hottest moments. And then I asked him, "What was the hottest part for you?"

Without hesitation he responded, "Performing in front of you."

Instantly, I was back in Top space.

According to B.E.S.T slave training:
Top-space is a state of erotically altered consciousness (EAC) achieved during a scene by the dominant or top. It is characterized by feelings of intense focus, clarity of thought, a sense of extreme power or high energy, and/or exhilaration. Feelings of distance and objectivity, as if one where commanding from a mountaintop, may paradoxically accompany feelings of connection to the submissive, as if there were a psychic link.

Top space is a phenomenon I'd read about since I first started researching the lifestyle but couldn't exactly say I'd experienced outside of a scene until recently. I wrote about how it feels in session in "Having the whole world at my feet." But there is a certain euphoria I'm learning I can experience without actually being in the middle of a scene.

Ok maybe THAT is my new favorite thing. An incredible drug.

As I wrote "Peeing on nodder," I found myself in Top space. And I marveled at the fact that just writing about it brought on the euphoria.

I have to assume my sensitivity to what I'm feeling is growing as my experience in BDSM increases. Or maybe I'm just learning how to harness all that hotness in different ways.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Being selfish in bed

"You, Lilyana, are selfish in bed," stated my FMT in a conversation recently.

"WHAAAAAT???" I was incredulous that HE of all people would say something like that.

"You are. You're selfish in bed," he said with a smirk. He does adore pushing my buttons.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me."

"Well, not with me," he said, back peddling. "You weren't like that with me at all. I just know you are with other guys."

"You aren't submissive. Of course things were different with you. But what in the world makes you think I am selfish in bed?"

"Lilyana, I live with you. I've heard you. I know."

I laughed. The acoustics in his house make it nearly impossible for an orgasm to go unnoticed. It's true.

"YOU are SO loud and I know all of your sounds. I can tell when you're getting eaten out and I know when you're on top. I can tell."

"Yeah? So?" I rolled my eyes at him in typical Lilyana fashion because I knew where he was going with the topic of conversation.

My FMT knows me better than just about anyone. Not only is he perceptive but he's known me for more than two years and we were dating for part of that. We've also been living as roommates for four months. However, even with his exposure to the lifestyle and as open minded as he is, he still sometimes misses the mark on his assessment of me and my motivations.

"I can tell from the sounds you make that those guys are making this all about you. That they're mostly here to please you."

"Exactly! That doesn't make me selfish. I'm dominant, remember?"

"Yeah, I KNOW," he said, annoyed. "But, you're selfish."

I sighed. "What you don't understand is that these guys get their pleasure from pleasing me. They are submissive to me. This is what they WANT."

"Yeah, I know."

"Then why are you saying I'm being selfish??"

"Because you are!"

"I am not!"

"Lilyana, I CAN HEAR YOU!"

At this point, I'm laughing at the ridiculousness of the fact that he's mistaken my dominance for selfishness. I suppose it's a rooky mistake a vanilla would make, but I just expected he'd understand me better than that.

And then I'm picturing him playing World of Warcraft in the loft outside my bedroom while I'm playing with a sub and saying to himself as the sounds I make change, "Oh he's licking her pussy now ... Ah she must have just climbed on top," and I'm still laughing.

"Well, maybe you should have soundproofed your house a little better, honey!"

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Peeing on nodder

I don't often use the term 'golden shower.' I rarely even call it 'water sports.' I sure as hell don't use flowery verbiage like 'drenching you in my sweet nectar.'

What the fuck ever. It's peeing on you. And I want you to know it.

Last month I played with nodder for the first time in quite some time. I had six weeks of pent up desire to make him growl and whimper and react in all of the ways that make me so hot for his submission.

I also had a mission. I wanted to pee on him.

It was something we hadn't done, something I'd threatened him with in those moments we'd discussed the things I still wanted to do to him, things I wanted to do with him.

As soon as we agreed to play again, I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I wanted to pee on him.

I started drinking extra water an hour before I knew we were going to play in preparation and had a large glass by the bed when we began to play.

I'd missed his mouth on mine and we made out like teenagers for a bit before I went into Domme-mode, ready for serious play.

I tied a pink ribbon with hearts on it around his erect cock, laughed how silly his cock looked, and told him if he let the ribbon slip off while he massaged me, I'd punish him. Every few minutes during the time I enjoyed his hands rubbing my body, I'd check to ensure the ribbon was still in place. It was. And I smiled each time.

As he massaged me, I'd stop occasionally to gulp more water. I was surprised he didn't notice and comment.

When my bladder couldn't take anymore, when my anticipation was also peaking, I pushed him back on the bed and tied his wrists in front of him.

Rope makes a regular appearance in most of my sessions. It's no secret that I love rope. So I'm sure nodder wasn't surprised to see me pull out a long red length.

He was surprised, however, when I pulled him from the bedroom into the bathroom while his wrists were bound.

"Lay down in the tub. I'm going to pee on you."

I pulled his bound wrists over his head and put one foot on one side of his body, the other on a ledge in the tub. He looked up at me, his big brown eyes glazed over in a way that told me he was in that delicious place in his head, his sub space.

I talked to him about what I was about to do and watched him sink deeper into sub space. I can't recall exactly what I said, only the look in his eyes and his whimper/growl in response.

I enjoy making a boy beg for me to do terrible things to him. It's my thing. It makes me inexplicably happy.

I made him ask for it. I made him beg for me to pee on him. Made him articulate why he wanted it.

And then I did it. I peed on him. He groaned as it splashed all over him and I laughed. I laughed and laughed.

Laying there drenched in my pee, his cock was rigid.

"Aww you're SO hard. I think you LIKE me peeing on you, don't you?"

He groaned and gasped, "Yes."

I put my foot on his cock as he laid there in the bottom of my tub, surprised to discover that urine makes decent lube.

Nodder has a developed somewhat of a relationship with my feet. I like teasing him about how he enjoys my feet too much. And I did so then, rubbing the sole of my foot across the length of his hard cock and laughing. He growled in response, his eyes rolling back up in his head from the sensation and the humiliation.

"Can I cum?" he was gasping within seconds.

"No," I laughed and pushed the head of his cock between my toes a few times before stopping. I knew he was right at the edge.

I let him breathe a few moments before starting again. Within seconds he was begging to cum again.

I can't remember how many times I edged him. He couldn't take much. And then I let him spurt his cum all over his belly and chest while I laughed, the stickiness mixing with the urine.